May your (holiday) ties be merry and bright

I spent the Thanksgiving holiday weekend counting my blessings.

By the time I was finishing my last plate of leftovers, I was counting something else.

My Christmas ties.

I was curious. Exactly how many do I own? I laid them out on the bed. I have seven … one for every day of the week.

Christmas is only three and a half weeks away, so there’s only a small window of opportunity to trot out all those tiny Santa and Christmas tree patterns and loop them in a knot around my neck.

‘Tis the season. 

You can’t wear a Christmas tie in June. Well, I guess you could. You might get some funny looks, though.

I’m a tie guy. I have 117 of them. That’s a four-month supply. I have every color on the wheel. Classic ties. Novelty ties. Statement ties. Sentimental ties. Silk ties. Polyester ties. Fat ties. Skinny ties.

 I have a tie that is more than 40 years old. I bought it at Kuppenheimer, which later became Men’s Wearhouse. Several of my neckties are 4 inches wide, and are woefully out of date. I look like I just stepped out of the 1970s when I wear them. But my father used to always say if you hang on to something long enough it will come back in style.

I’m not trying to make a fashion statement. I’m just old school. Dress for success. Some men don’t wear neckties. They are uncomfortable with a noose. They view it as the closest thing to a public hanging.

In addition to my seven holiday ties, I have six Cherry Blossom ties. That’s a close second. Yes, all are pink.

I have two Christmas ties from Joyland. My wife bought them at Belk. One has a solid red background with Christmas trees, the other has Santa carrying his sack of toys beneath the tree.

I have a couple of truck ties. One has red pickups carrying Christmas trees against a blue backdrop. The other has blue pickups hauling trees against a background redder than a Nu-Way weiner.

I don’t own a tacky Christmas sweater, but I do have a tacky Christmas tie. A Grinch tie was gifted to me a few years back. I don’t wear it much, but “How the Grinch Stole Christmas’’ is a holiday classic, and Dr. Seuss is one of my favorite children’s authors. 

It shows the Grinch strapping a pair of antlers on the head of his dog, Max. On the inside label is a quote from the book: “If I can’t find a reindeer I’ll make one instead.’’

I still have more than a dozen of the “Save the Children’’ ties that were popular in the 1990s. The one I own with a holiday theme is a colorful tree, wrapped presents and stars against a dark backdrop. Its name is “The Power Star,’’ and it was drawn by an 8-year-old girl named Samantha. (I wonder where Samantha is now.)

By far, my favorite holiday tie is jolly Santa carrying an armful of toys. His face is big, bold and beautiful. I get compliments every time I wear it. I wore it to church on Sunday, and it brought smiles to a lot of faces. 

May your ties be merry and bright.