Ticket to ‘Fairadise’: A look at this year’s Georgia National Fair

There are plenty of reasons to attend the 36th annual Georgia National Fair in Perry, but here is your pocket version.

For 11 days, “Fairadise,” as it is affectionately called, is the center of the universe in Middle Georgia. There is something for everyone — and everything for some. You can observe thousands of unscripted sideshows being played out under the same October sky.

A near-record 545,382 people turned out last year to eat, drink and be merry. That’s three times the population of Macon.

Just thinking about it, we can almost taste the powdered sugar of funnel cake and hear the gravel-voiced carnies barking in the midway.

Need a reason to go? I’m glad you asked.

— People watching: Short. Tall. Young. Old. Skinny. Fat. City folks. Country folks. It’s a melting pot of faces. Their stories are often written in their smiles, the color of their hair, their hats and T-shirts, and the tattoos and wrinkles on their skin.

— The rides: Armbands are your permission slip to spin around, flip upside down, defy gravity, jostle your bones and race through space. You can toss and tumble like socks in the spin cycle of a giant washing machine. As you exit, check for white knuckles and make sure you still have all your body parts and vital organs.

— Ferris wheel and carousel: They are the most iconic rides. The Ferris wheel bucket lifts us up, brings us down and floats us so high we swear we can touch the clouds. If we climb aboard a painted pony on the carousel, it’s a wayback machine.

— The sounds: Welcome to the wonderful land of “ahs.” You will hear so many squeals you might think you’re at a Taylor Swift concert. There is laughter. And giggles. Maybe that’s why they call it “amusement.’’ 

— The food: Fair fare is an aromatic buffet line, a taste of the exotic and eclectic. There are spicy sniffs from the kiosks and a dreamy parade of sugar highs offered by the food vendors. Elephant ears. Fried oreos. Kettle corn. Salt water taffy. Soft custard. Corn dogs. Candy apples. And turkey legs the size of an offensive tackle’s thighs.  

— Eye candy: The fair is not only a culinary adventure — it’s a feast for your eyes. Soak in the scenery. You’ll notice folks on stilts, playing “strolling”  pianos and performing water ski stunts on the pond. It’s hypnotists, rope tricks, pirates, horse riders, racing pigs and frisbee-catching dogs.

— Count your steps: It’s somehow appropriate that the fairgrounds are located on Larry Walker Parkway. You, too, will become a walker. Wear comfortable shoes. As you traverse the midway and browse the barns and arenas, you will record so many steps your Fitbit will get a workout. If you have small children, don’t forget the strollers.

— Animal kingdom: Who needs the zoo when the fair brings a menagerie to your back yard? There are reptiles, baby chicks, honey bees and tropical birds. If you can’t find the animal barns and arenas on the map, just follow your nose to the pigs, cows, rabbits, goats, sheep and horses. Yes, take a whiff of those barnyard smells. It’s not every day you get to be this close to swine — unless you count breakfast bacon, Nu-Way hot dogs and barbecue plates from Satterfield’s, Fresh Air and Fincher’s.

— Feats of skill: There are boundless opportunities to toss, throw and flick your wrists to win a giant stuffed animal that you will have to tote around for the rest of the day. Feeling frisky? Let the wise guy try to guess your weight or age. Want to show off your muscles? Grab the mallet and strike the bell at the top. If you’re looking to walk away with a consolation prize, there’s always the unbridled joy of winning a goldfish that may or may not live past Exit 144 on the ride home.

— The lights: They twinkle. They blink. They glow. They flash. If you head for the parking lot before sundown, you will miss out on the visual experience of the night lights. Drones, airplanes and flying saucers get to admire them from above. But it’s pretty cool from below, too. And don’t forget the fireworks. Who doesn’t love a firework show for the nightcap?

— The music: Treat your ears. Tap your toes. Expand your musical horizons. The fair stages will be filled with familiar names and rising stars. Country. Gospel. Hard rock. Jazz. Hip hop. Rumba Latina. And, of course, Macon’s favorite blues band: Big Mike and Booty Papas.

— The Magic Man: Speaking of Mikes from Macon, Mike Fuller’s magic shows are a mainstay on the midway. The veteran Macon magician has been pulling rabbits out of hats and snatching coins out of thin air for 35 years in the shadows of the clock tower. The only fair attraction with a longer run is Robinson’s Racing Pigs.

— Outside the lines: Aside from the thrilling rides and tempting food, you can take time out and opt for the slower pace of the exhibition halls filled with artwork, photography and quilts. It’s gratifying to know that those blue ribbons will one day be framed on walls and pressed in scrapbooks. Also, be on the lookout for the offerings grown and made in Georgia. Shop “local” at the national fair. It’s a lot more fun than ordering off of Amazon.

— The parking: There’s plenty of it out in the grassy fields, and it’s organized. But be warned. On crowded fair days, you can end up in what seems like the next county.  And if you drive a black, gray or silver vehicle, pay attention to where you park. You might want to take a photo on your phone. (There’s no need to tell you that half the cars, trucks and SUVs out there have the same complexion. You’ll have better odds if you drive a green Kia, yellow Jeep or bright-orange Hyundai.)— The nostalgia: If you’re an old-timer, the Perry fair may look and feel antiseptic compared to the sawdust country fairs and small-town fairs of your youth. But it’s still the fair. It has no rivals. If you’re young at heart, fill yourself with wonder. Go make some memories.