Dear Macon: ‘Get Up Offa That Thing’ — Turnout is key for kazoo record attempt

Sharon, Elaine, Debra, Kris, Bonnie, Nancy, Ruth and Denise.

They don’t carry the same name recognition as Sonny and Cher or Sam and Dave. They will never have the star power of John, Paul, George and Ringo. 

By this time next week, though, we will get to watch them toot their horns and make their stage debut in Macon.

The eight ladies — all card-carrying “seasoned” citizens — hail from Winston-Salem. They met after moving to North Carolina from other states.

Elaine Potusky and her sister, Sharon, organized a fun-loving, musical group last fall and pronounced themselves the “Ladies Kazoo Band of Greater Winston-Salem.’’ 

The name hit a bit of a B-flat on the musical scale, so they rebranded from snoozy to snazzy. They started referring to themselves as the “Kazoo Sisterhood,’’ even though Sharon and Elaine are the only siblings in the band.

It was a blessing that the kazoo is considered the world’s most “democratic” instrument — anyone who can hum can play it — because  Kris Ryan was the only “sister” with any music background. She played the flute and piccolo in high school and college, so she was appointed the group’s music director by default.

The Kazoo Sisterhood learned some tunes, rehearsed some Christmas songs and performed holiday programs at area nursing homes.

They never expected their stage to get any larger or to travel very many miles from home.

That all changed in January, when they were contacted by Taryn Scher. She is known as “The Sparkle Boss” at TK PR, her public relations firm in Greenville, South Carolina.

“She said she had stumbled upon our band and wanted to be sure that she informed us of this  ‘bucket list experience,’ ’’ Elaine said.

The opportunity in waiting was a chance to participate in a record  attempt for the world’s largest kazoo band at the birthplace of the kazoo in Macon.   

The shot at the Guinness World Record was on Friday, March 28, exactly two months after National Kazoo Day on January 28 and on the eve of the final weekend of Macon’s Cherry Blossom Festival.

They wrote it in ink on their calendars.

None of the Kazoo Sisterhood have been to Macon, much less the festival. It has always been just a dot on the map, a green exit sign along the interstate, a place you bypass on the way to somewhere else.

Not for long. They will pull into town on Wednesday and don’t plan on leaving until they know the final score on Friday.

They have been invited to perform on stage in a long lineup of entertainment in the two hours leading up to the world-record try. They will play a couple of “fun” songs and will be accompanied on the tuba by Dr. Buddy Marterre, an associate professor at the Wake Forest School of Medicine.

The Sisterhood, whose oldest member is an octogenarian, has become a mini symphony of media darlings. They were featured in an advertisement in The Melody’s special festival section last week. And, on the day of the kazoo record attempt, they will do a live interview at 9 a.m. on Fox 5 Atlanta’s “Good Morning, Atlanta.’’

The city with a deep musical heritage has made two previous attempts at the record at Luther Williams Field in 2007 and 2008. Both were unsuccessful. 

Now, a kazoo calvary has been resurrected to put melodious tweets in the seats. The current Guinness World Record for the largest kazoo ensemble is 5,190 participants at the Royal Albert Hall in London.

Visit Macon has ordered 10,000 kazoos and is counting on a get-out-the-vote campaign to fill the Atrium Amphitheater starting at 4 p.m. Organizers are urging folks to register in advance at visitmacon.org. The $5 entry fee will get you a commemorative kazoo,  four hours of entertainment and the opportunity to go home with your fingerprints on a world record.

An adjudicator from Guinness will be in Macon to handle procedural matters. An auditor will be at the amphitheater to certify the results after the crowd performs a five-song medley for the required five minutes.

The song selection is 100 percent Macon — Otis Redding’s “Sittin’ on the Dock of the Bay” and “Hard to Handle,’’ James Brown’s “Get Up Offa That Thing,’’ “Ramblin’ Man” by The Allman Brothers Band and Little Richard’s “Tutti Frutti.”

Can you imagine 7,000 … 8,000 … 9,000 … 10,000 kazoos playing that musical arrangement for 300 seconds? (Think of it as a way to exact revenge on the cicadas.)

The kazoo is in your court, Macon. Do we want our most telling event of the past three months to be the New Year’s Eve implosion of the old 16-story hotel downtown?

Don’t be a sit-down town. As the Godfather of Soul — who recorded his first song in Macon — would shout out, “Get Up Offa That Thing.’’

At the end of the day on March 28, we should be able to look back and say three words.

We did it.

Ed Grisamore participated in Macon’s two unsuccessful attempts for the World’s Largest Kazoo Band. He is feeling pretty good this time. Don’t let him down.